Soesa
By Graeme Lay

The letter was addressed to The Careers Adviser, Newton Girls High School, Ponsonby. Mrs Williams opened it. It was from an importing firm – Island Foods Inc. – and it stated that the company had a vacancy for an office junior, minimum qualification a pass in three School Certificate subjects, successful applicant to begin immediately. Mrs Williams put the letter down and chewed one arm of her glasses. This job sounded just right for Soesa.

Mrs Williams was Careers Adviser in the mornings and an English teacher in the afternoons at Newton Girls High, and by one of those quirks of timetabling which occur from time to time, she had taught English to Soesa Fiasasagi for three consecutive years. Soesa. Mrs Williams slipped her glasses back on, reached over to the green filing cabinet beside her desk and drew out a white record card. She scanned the information it contained. Fiasasagi, Soesa Sarah, 195 Selwyn Street, Grey Lynn. Date of Birth: 3/10/58. Place of Birth: Apia (Western Samoa). Father: freezing worker. Mother: machinist. Pupil’s vocational preference: secretary. Mrs Williams studied the small coloured photo stapled to the top right-hand corner of the card. Soesa’s expression was serious. Her face was broad and oval-shaped, the skin very smooth and dark. Her black hair was thick and flaring, her cheek-bones high and prominent and her large brown eyes were tilted upwards at the corners, giving her a faintly Asiatic appearance. Soesa’s face could have been taken straight from a Gauguin painting.

Mrs Williams tumbles the card and read the teachers’ comments. Soesa is a quiet and courteous pupil… Soesa always works to the best of her ability… Soesa’s work is meticulous… Soesa is a credit to her race. She looked at the examination marks. 1975: failed School Certificate. 1976: passed School Certificate in Typewriting, Book-keeping and Shorthand. Admitted to sixth form. 1977: failed University Entrance – aggregate marks in four subjects 113. 1978: repeat sixth form course. The teacher turned back to the photo and the family details. Date of Birth: 3/10/58. Family moved to New Zealand 1963. She stared at the birth date until its implications were clear. Soesa would turn twenty before this school year was over.

Mrs Williams replaced the record card, but the girl’s face lingered in her mind. She sighed heavily. Twenty this year, repeating her sixth form course. But if she stayed at school for another decade, Soesa would not get her University Entrance. It wasn’t that she was unintelligent or in any way lazy; it was just that she could not pass written exams. She would revise her notes for weeks, answer every question in her immaculate hand-writing, but her answers seldom bore any relation to the questions, and even by giving her extra marks wherever it was at all possible, her teachers could not get her through. It was typewriting, book-keeping and shorthand that had got her through School Certificate, and in typewriting she still topped the class. But typing was not a U.E subject. Her spoken English was good, and Mrs Williams knew full well how Soesa could commit poetry and the plots of novels to memory. In her first year in the sixth form she had learnt ‘Ode to Autumn’ off by heart, but even that could only get her seven marks out of twenty in the accrediting exam. The poetry question had been on Keat’s imagery. She knew Soesa spoke mainly Samoan at home because of the absence note which had come one day. Dear Miss Williamson, this is why that Soesa was not coming by school since Monday. On the church picnic Sunday she is spraned the leg for the volleyball team. Yours fathfully, V. Fiasasagi. Was it surprising that Soesa had difficulty with her written work?

And yet if she got a job she would have no trouble in keeping it. But for how long now had she been trying to get her one? A yea. No, longer, since the end of her second year in the fifth form. There had been several interviews for likely positions, Typist, secretary, receptionist, bank clerk. But despite the glowing references from her teachers, Soesa had been turned down for them all. When Mrs Williams had made subsequent inquiries over the phone to the personnel managers, hey had all said much the same thing. Too reserved… didn’t seem able to communicate… just wouldn’t open her mouth… ‘I mean,’ explained the man who had made the last comment, ‘it’s not much use to us having a receptionist who won’t say anything.’ Then he had added with a chuckle, ‘perhaps what’s where they got the name coconut shy…’

The teacher felt a surge of anger at the memory. Then she thought of the new letter again, and a glow of hope began to replace her anger. Island Foods Inc., minimum qualifications a pass in three subjects. It sounded ideal. And if the firm traded with the Islands there might even be scope for some translation work for Soesa. Mrs Williams checked her watch, moved her finger along the timetable on the wall, located a class and a room, hen reached for a pad and pen. Please send Soesa Fiasasagi to my office immediately, she wrote, then she handed the note to the fourth form girl sitting at the desk outside her office.

The knock was very soft. ‘Come in,’ she called. Soesa’s dark face came round the door, and at the sight of the teacher she smiled broadly. ‘Hello Mrs Williams,’ she said. The teacher smiled at the girl. ‘Hello Soesa, sit down. I think I’ve found just the job for you.’

Once again they rehearsed the interview, and by the end of the third day, Soesa could give quiet but firm answers to all Mrs Williams’ questions.

‘Now Miss Fiasasagi, would you tell me why you would like this job?’

‘Because I have taken commercial subjects at school and because I would enjoy office work.’

‘Should you be successful in your application, how long do you think you would remain in the position?’

‘For at least two years. After that I would like to go back to Samoa for a visit.’

‘And if you got the position would you live at home.’

‘Yes. This office is only ten minutes by bus from where I live.’

‘Do you take shorthand?’

‘Yes. I gained 68% in the School Certificate exam for Shorthand.’

Mrs Williams smiled warmly at the girl. ‘That’s fine Soesa, fine.’ The respect she felt for her was somehow different to that which she felt for her European pupils, but it was respect nevertheless, deep-felt and genuine. Soesa would be an asset to any office. She stood up. ‘Good luck’ she said. ‘And don’t forget to come and tell me how you got on.’

Soesa flashed a smile back at the teacher, gratitude shining from her eyes. ‘Thank you Mrs Williams,’ she said.

Soesa planned her afternoon very carefully. She showed the form giving her permission to leave early to the school secretary and signed the exeat book. She walked to the bus stop at the top of the hill. It was strange to be on the bus at this time of day, she thought as the nearly-empty bus glided along. Usually she stayed at school until nearly half-past four. On Mondays and Wednesday s there was volleyball practice, Tuesdays and Thursdays Polynesian Club and Friday was Christian Fellowship. She got off the bus at the intersection of Ponsonby Road and the street which ran down to where the office was. The bus clock showed it was twenty past two. She was a bit early, so she walked quite slowly down the long straight street until she reached number 105. The office was a square, single-storied building between a warehouse and a corner diary. It was painted yellow and it had large aluminium-framed windows along the wall which faced the street. Between the building and the footpath there was a small strip of lawn, and over the front door there was a sign which read Island Foods Incorporated.

Soesa stood in front of the office for a moment, then she went through the swinging glass doors. Inside there was a room with a lino floor, a potted palm in each corner and a desk behind which a middle-aged lady was sitting. The lady looked up. ‘Yes dear?’ she said. Soesa held her hands tightly together in front of her.

‘I… I’ve come for the interview.’ The woman’s features sharpened a little.

‘Interview? Oh, for the office junior’s job.’ Soesa nodded and the woman got up. ‘Just wait there and I’ll see if Mr Harding’s ready for you.’ She went off through a door behind her desk. Soesa stood in the foyer, making her eyes look anywhere except at the door. Mr Harding. A Palagi name. A Palagi boss. Just like the other ones. She had hoped that this one might be one of her own people, because of the name of the firm. Another Palagi man. She felt nervous of them, the way they looked at her always made her feel…

‘Go straight in please,’ the lady was saying, leaving the door open behind her. ‘Mr Harding’s been expecting you.’ Soesa hesitated for a moment, then walked in. It was a large office containing a desk, filing cabinets at one end, bookshelves at the other, bright neon lights set into the low ceiling and Venetian blinds over the window. As she entered the man looked up. He had a round, rather red face, bulging eyes and a moustache which hung down around both corners of his mouth. He was dressed in a plain cream-colored suit, pale pink shirt and pink and black striped tie. Soesa thought he looked about forty. He stared at her a moment, glanced down at his desk, then looked up again.

‘Oh yes, it’s Miss Fia…’ he looked down again. “Fiasa… sagi isn’t it? Sit down please.’ He gestured towards the chair in front of the desk. Soesa sat on the chair and clenched her hands tightly in her lap. Suddenly her heart began to pound, so strongly that she was sure the man must be able to hear it. She sat very still, staring at the Venetian blind behind him, hoping that the pounding would slow down. The man tipped his chair back but continued to look at her. ‘We haven’t had a Samoan girl in the office before, strangely enough. Plenty down at the factory in Otahuhu of course, but none in the office. Well’ – he sat up straight again – ‘let’s find out a bit about you. I suppose they told you at school what we require. Our present junior, Gaylene, is leaving at the end of next week. We’ll need someone proficient at typing, shorthand and book-keeping to replace her.’ He paused, looking down at the desk again. ‘Now your teachers have said some very nice things in these references, so let’s see what you know. But first of all though, would you tell me why you would like this job?’

Soesa was holding herself rigid now, and the pounding in her chest seemed to be making her whole body heave in and out. She was staring so hard at the window behind the man that he was just a blur before her. She could feel a burning feeling down between her legs, and she squeezed her thighs together to try and stop it, and she was trying to hard to stop the pounding and the burning that her throat had gone all dry and when the man asked the question she knew what she wanted to say and she tried to make her mouth say the words but nothing came, only the dryness and the pounding and the hot wetness in the palms of her hands…

Outside on the footpath the air was so fresh and so good to breathe that Soesa felt as if she had stepped into a cool shower. She began to walk back up the street. She knew that she had failed the interview, she could tell by the way the man’s voice had got more and more impatient when she couldn’t answer his questions properly. It wasn’t that she didn’t know the answers, it was the feeling that came over her when he kept looking at her. It was just like the other times, the other interviews. She bit her bottom lip hard and tried to put the man out of her mind, to think ahead, not back. A job could wait until next year, till after she had got the U.E. After all, in the Christmas holidays, she could take that laundry job Aunty Mala had promised that she could have while she and Uncle Lenny were in Apia. The only person Soesa felt sorry for was Mrs Williams, who always looked so faanoanoa, so sad when she came back to school without getting the job. Soesa thought again how much she liked Mrs Williams, and school. School was like another Agia really, she thought suddenly, with the clubs and the games and all the other girls. Tasi and Tina and Vala and Mele. They had all been in the same class right through school. She got to the top of the hill. The post Office clock showed three o’clock. She could catch a bus back to the school in time for volleyball practice if she hurried. Soesa walked on, quickly, in the direction of the bus-stop.